Closer
by Macx
Summary: movie fic. Imperfection series. Sam and Bumblebee's relationship changes. Rated for suggestive content.


his is the fic that hopefully bridges a little of what's missing between the Imperfection and Imperfection Deviation series. Have fun reading!

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TITLE: Closer  
SERIES: Imperfection Deviation  
AUTHOR: Macx  
RATING: R-ish for suggestive content  
DISCLAIMER: None of the characters belong to me, sadly. They are owned by people with a lot more money :)  
Author's Voice of Warning (aka Author's Note):  
English is not my first language; it's German. This is the best I can do. Any mistakes you find in here, collect them and you might win a prize The spell-checker said everything's okay, but you know how trustworthy those thingies are...  
FEEDBACK: Loved

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He had packed his things. Everything he had collected here in the past years had been boxed and loaded onto a truck. The apartment was as empty as the day he had moved in. Sam felt a little pang of regret that he had to leave this place. His first own place after moving out of his parents' house to be closer to Mission City University. Of course it had been small, but still functional. Of course he had known it was only temporary, but it was still a sentimental moment.

His university time was over. The dissertation was with his professor and Sam had suddenly a lot of free time, which he used for things like moving. The home at the Autobot base was more than ready. Not just functional but a house.

With a sigh he took the last box and left the apartment, locking the door, and went down the stairs where Bumblebee was waiting.

"Ready," he announced as he placed the box onto the back seat.

"Where to?" Bumblebee wanted to know.

Sam shrugged. He didn't feel like returning to the base or visit his parents. In the end he chose one of their favorite spots, near a lake.

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Sam knew that his relationship with Bumblebee was something no one outside his tight circle of friends, humans and Autobots alike, would ever be able to understand – or accept without looking at him the wrong way.

What human was attracted to a robot?

It wasn't so much a physical aspect as a matter of minds. Sam's ability of technopathy gave him a very special insight into the Autobots and their sparks. The spark was incredible to his mind's eye. It was beauty and raw power. The gentle vibrations of a spark touched his sensitive mind and gave him shiver, but Bumblebee's spark was such a powerful connection, it blew his mind away.

"Spark bond," Jazz had once remarked softly, smiling knowingly at him.

"But I'm human!"

"You're a very unique human. You can bond, Sam. What you feel is what I experience, too."

Sam knew that. He had accidentally touched the spark bond between Barricade and Jazz, and it was addictive. He had no idea what the connection between him and Bumblebee looked like for an outsider with similar abilities.

Blue optics caught his contemplative eyes and he saw a smile in the alien face. He felt it even strongly through the link.

"Thinking again?" Bumblebee asked, sounding amused.

"Kinda."

Bumblebee trailed fingers over Sam's body. It didn't really feel like metal. Sam closed his eyes, enjoying the connection. They couldn't do much physically. Compared to what he had had with Mikaela, this was like a very watered down version of a relationship. Sex wasn't anything like between humans. Bumblebee had no concept of sexual relationships and Sam couldn't imagine having sex with a robot.

There was kink and there was impossible contemplations.

He laughed softly. Right. Bumblebee would probably look at him as if he had lost all his marbles should he ever try. And fantasies about humping the car were… Sam tried no to go there.

Amusement echoed over the deep-link. Bumblebee had easily picked up on the train of thought.

"Oh, shut up," he murmured and sighed with pleasure at the continued caresses.

:Only humans would have these ideas: Bumblebee sent, chuckling.

When they deep-linked and shut out the real world, which only happened when they both were completely safe, Sam allowed himself to slide closer to Bumblebee's spark and touch the representation of his partner in a way he would a human woman. It didn't have the same effect on the Autobot, but it was pleasurable for them both. Bumblebee was very willing to experiment, though they had both drawn the line at holograms. The technopathic connection was too intense anyway. Nothing could top that.

Never would have thought, Sam mused.

The beginning had been embarrassing enough.

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_Sam didn't know when things had changed between him and Bumblebee, or if they had really changed at all. Maybe it was what it had always been, just with little additions here or there over time. Bumblebee had quickly turned from 'battered old Camaro because his Dad was too cheap to buy him something else' to 'freaky alien robot' to 'personal guardian' and then to 'best friend'. And his life had never been the same after that first night he had chased his 'stolen car' down the road, watching him change into something incredibly alien at the old yard._

He still remembered the shock and the fear and the trickle of something else, a kind of excitement born out of too much adrenaline. He had gone up against trained Sector Seven agents to fight for Bumblebee, driven by his cries of what he had interpreted as pain as they had tried to freeze him. Sam had been bruised and battered, running on adrenaline, and he had single-mindedly fought to free his friend. An alien mechanoid he hadn't known for more than a day.

That feeling hadn't abated until way after the last battle, after things had settled and Sam had been able to breathe and think again.

Mission City had only been the beginning. Saving the world had simply opened the door to something so out of this world, Sam still had trouble really understanding it all.

Nerd.

Hero.

High-school kid.

Savior of his kind.

Student.

Technopath.

The latter had thrown him for a complete loop, had turned his sane world into chaos. It had taken time to grasp sanity again, to be able to live a more or less normal life. That he owed part of that sanity to Barricade was… weird. They had reached a strange kind of respect-filled relationship that defied the definition of friendship, but was more than allies. Barricade still trained him, still set up tasks for Sam to do, but the accidents had lessened. There had been no more backlashes, no more accidental touches of the spark-bond, and Sam was firmer in his approaches of the alien mind.

Bumblebee hadn't been happy about Barricade's closeness to his charge, but he had accepted it after a while. Just like he had accepted Sam's growing technopathic ability and the need for an anchor that came with it. That anchor had been Bumblebee from the start. For some reason Sam found the mech's mind-presence to be calming, balancing and soothing. Bumblebee had never complained.

Leaning back against the warm windscreen, arms laced behind his head, he watched clouds drift.

His mind was calm, though not empty, and he felt the gentle pulses of Bumblebee in the back. He kept the uplink open as often as possible. It helped to get to know all the different ways a Cybertronian brain worked.

Deep-linking was… different. It was like establishing a bond. Sam knew bonds, had seen the one shared between Jazz and Barricade, and while he had no spark to complete what existed between him and Bumblebee, the connection was the same.

And it was something that had made him look at the past year. The past weeks in particular. It wasn't just his friendship with the mech, it was what had so naturally slid into their pre-existing bond of being really good friends.

It was what had happened last night and what still haunted Sam – in a good way.

:Sam?:

He exhaled softly. :Hm?:

:It troubles you:

:No… yes… kinda… It's new, Bee:

:You have experienced such intense physical reactions before:

:Not with you!: he exclaimed.

Mikaela had been different. There had been touch involved. Lots of touching and teasing and good stuff and… not just a technopathic link to an alien life form…

:But your reaction was not different: Bumblebee stated, sounding a little confused.

:No, I wasn't: he sighed.

Arousal was arousal, no matter where it started.

:Would you want us to be different? More like your relationship with Mikaela?:

Sam groaned and tried not to imagine that particular act. :Bee, no! You're not Mikaela, nor are you a human woman. It wouldn't be the same:

:For your body it is:

:Bee!:

Sam heard his friend chuckle. Bumblebee had been on this planet too long, he thought darkly. He was developing a tendency for merciless teasing and bad jokes. Not that Jazz was any better. With his love of soaps he was even more inclined to bad jokes.

He closed his eyes, felt Bumblebee's presence. It was gentle on the outside, but underneath it lay the fierceness of the warrior and soldier. Sam had seen so much throughout their first deep-link, so many battles, so much pain, Mission City had been a walk in the park compared to Bumblebee's past. They had explored the possibility of what Sam could do while deep-linking, what he chose to see and how he reacted. It was what he trained with Bumblebee, and he knew Barricade was secretly amused about it.

And throughout that intense contact, those intimate moments, he had felt something inside of him react to the powerful spark, to the warmth he had only experienced when he had accidentally slid along Barricade's bond to Jazz. He knew what sparks felt like, knew each and every one of the Autobots, and one Decepticon, by heart. He could tell them apart, he felt their thrum and pulse, but Bumblebee's had been… closer. More powerful than even Optimus Prime's, though Prime's was incredible all by itself. It wasn't power as such, it was… emotion. Something inside Bumblebee touched Sam and wouldn't let him go.

Sam blamed it on the changes by the Allspark, on the technopathy, on everything, even his now changed genetic make-up. Bumblebee had simply accepted it as a fact. It didn't seem to faze him at all. Sam, on the other hand, needed to think about it, needed to analyze his own emotions.

He hadn't come to any conclusion. It had grown even more intense lately and just yesterday, the contact had sent such a thrill through him, he had felt like a fifteen year-old, hormone-driven kid again.

:Does it bother you?: Bumblebee asked.

:I don't know: he replied honestly. :It's… new. It feels… good:

:It does for me, too:

Sam sat up, legs crossed under him. "It's not… I mean, we're not having…" He felt embarrassment rise. "Sex."

"Your way of copulation cannot be compared to what we share," Bumblebee told him gently.

Sam rubbed a nervous hand over his thigh. Bumblebee knew about human sex, of course. How couldn't he? There was the internet and there was TV, and it wasn't like Mikaela and Sam had stopped at kissing. Sam felt a hot blush chase over his cheeks. They had made out in and on the car, so that was a first hint. And what had happened elsewhere… Bumblebee must have been able to pick it up on the scanners.

"It feels like it to me," he now murmured.

"Because your mind stimulates your body, Sam."

"It's… embarrassing."

Because there had been no touch. With Mikaela it had been the touch and what he had been looking at. Visual stimulation. Sam knew all about it. Girls like her had been unattainable to the non-jocks like him, or so he had thought. Beautiful and unavailable. Like really hot cars. Like the Camaro he was now driving. Bee drew looks, he knew. Hot car, beautiful and hot girl, Sam had been The Man. Not that he had ever looked like it. He still wasn't a muscle jock, had no ruggedly good looks, was skinny and too geeky and not one of the cool kids.

Strangely enough, it was all he wanted to be. Himself. At college there were still those who shunned the geeks like him – though he wasn't a genius and a bottom rung geek among the regular geeks – but it no longer bothered him.

He was part of something incredible. He knew the truth about Mission City and the Hoover Dam. He knew about alien races and the Allspark. Sure, the technopathy gave him an edge when it came to understanding the machine, the object, but he had to learn the theory behind it just like everyone.

"Do you feel stimulated now?"

Sam almost slid off the hood, cheeks stained red. "No!"

Bumblebee chuckled, amusement clear. There was a little nudge and Sam took the hint, getting off the gleaming yellow Camaro. Bumblebee transformed and knelt down, eye-level with Sam.

"Does it bother you?" he wanted to know.

"I… no… not really… it's you and… well… I know you… you're my friend…"

Way to go, Sam, he thought angrily. Stammer like a kid.

"I like it," he finished lamely. "It's a great feeling."

Like Mikaela, a treacherous part of his mind whispered. Only different. No naked body, no softness, no exchange of bodily fluids. It had been all in his head.

He almost laughed.

Now that sounded insane.

"Your kind has rules and limitations," Bumblebee told him. "You have been raised with them. It's hard to go past what's expected of you."

"Expected?" he echoed.

"A wife and children."

Sam swallowed hard, staring into the blue optics. He saw no judgment there, no anger. Just the facts.

"I like being with you," he finally managed.

"But your culture limits you. You don't understand what happened."

"Why would you be with me?" Sam blurted. "I'm not of your own kind! I'm only your charge. You… you… there's nothing… I mean, you can't compare me to… one of your own… and… why would you? It's not a spark bond!" he finally cried, sounding almost desperate.

Because a spark bond would be so much more… personal… just the two of them… something only he had with Bumblebee.

And how girlish is that? he thought angrily.

He respected Bumblebee. He knew what his friend was. He had deep-linked too often not to know. He was aware of all the limitations and all the difference and all… just all! He had never really been scared of him. He hadn't felt disgusted yesterday. It was just so confusing!

Bumblebee reached out and touched him, blunt finger tips brushing over his chest, then his cheek.

"For us there is no imperative to mate with another of our kind. For you there is. It's what you were taught, how your race survives because of that kind of procreation. Your special ability to connect with us is unique. That you chose me as your anchor was an honor. I didn't stay with you because it was an obligation, Sam. It was voluntary. Just like I allowed that contact. I want this."

"Why?" came the weak question.

"Because I can feel your resonance inside me. I can feel that this is right."

"It's not…" Sam started.

"No, it's not a spark bond and never will be. You don't have a spark. But mine feels the connection to your mind. It's enough, and I don't want to miss it."

And Sam didn't want to miss feeling this completion, this kind of belonging. He could only compare it to Jazz and Barricade, and it felt so much the same. There was this absolute certainty he could trust Bumblebee.

:Sam?:

He met the blue optics again, saw everything in there, felt it all through the mind-link.

:Link: Bumblebee coaxed. :See it:

He trembled slightly, then opened his mind, let the link deepen, let himself sink into the alien mind he knew so intimately by now. Emotions he had no words for enveloped him, thoughts that he couldn't translate into appropriate words flowed by, and the presence that was everything surrounded his own mind.

This was more than physical. Hell, physical came last to everything else the bond offered. The pleasure of it all came not from hormones or physical attraction. It was so much more, so much deeper, and still so alien, but it was only between them.

:Your reaction is physical because of who and what you are, Sam: Bumblebee said. :It's new to me, but not disgusting:

Bumblebee had been on Earth long before the others, had been a spy for them, had more knowledge of humans than any of the others. He had never shown any aversion to any human – aside from maybe Simmons.

Sam let the other, much stronger presence touch him.

:Not stronger: came the soft murmur. :You could wipe my mind with a thought:

:I'd never…!:

:I know, I know: Bee soothed him, wrapping himself more tightly around the upset human mind.

They stayed like that for a while, then Bumblebee carefully removed his presence. Sam felt unbalanced for a moment, then let his mind surface. It was so strange to come back to a world where he was physically so different from Bumblebee. He found himself leaning against his friend, a hand against his back, blue optics watching him patiently.

"This is really weird," Sam murmured, not moving from where he sat. It was comfortable. Familiar.

Bumblebee ran a calming caress over his back. "It is," he confirmed. "For both of us. My kind is more accustomed to bonding like this, though spark bonds are extremely rare and precious. Aside from Jazz I never met anyone who spark-bonded. Casual connections are normal."

"Yeah. And interspecies relationships are even rarer."

Bumblebee chuckled. "I suppose we are the first."

"Why would you even chance it?" the human wanted to know.

A shrug. It was a very human gesture, like so many the Autobots had adopted.

"Because we are… compatible?"

Sam chuckled. "Uh-huh. Round hole, square peg."

Bumblebee tilted his head and Sam knew he was accessing the internet. The blue optics lit up with amusement.

"Physically we couldn't be more different, but this isn't about physical compatibility. Autobots don't require it. Bonds among our kind can be between each and every single individual, despite size, built or even… faction."

"It's weird," Sam repeated.

He rested his head against the yellow metal, felt its smoothness, the warmth from the sun. It was all so different from what he had been used to in the past years. Mikaela had been a human being, a human woman, and they had snuggled and kissed and cuddled and done what teenagers did when they were alone and liked each other very, very much. Bumblebee was a lot bigger, was alien, was made entirely of metal, and there was no way Sam could even imagine them doing what human couples did. At least not physically.

On the mind-plane it was different. They were close, closer than was physically possible. Bumblebee wasn't a large robot, Sam wasn't a vulnerable organic. There were no limitations, just… them. It made up for the lack of contact otherwise. It even made up for the physical boundaries.

Not that Sam could imagine sex with a robot. He wasn't into that kind of kink. Actually, he considered himself rather kink-free.

Bumblebee laughed softly as he picked up the thoughts. Currently their barriers were down. "Considering we miss certain parts," he teased. "And lack the rudimentary nervous cells to transmit such pleasure…"

"Aw, Bee, shut up!" Sam groaned. "This is just gross!"

Hormones or not, this was beyond his imagination. It gave food to the thought of whether Bumblebee would be turned on by Sam sitting on his hood, patting a fender, changing gears or whatever else.

:I'm not: Bumblebee supplied helpfully.

:Thank god…: Sam grinned lightly, nudging the other mind playfully. :Otherwise I'd be wondering about the car wash…:

Bumblebee poked him back in indignation. Sam grinned.

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They drove back in amiable silence around dusk. Sam had stayed in Mission City over the weekend and the apartment complex was quiet, almost abandoned. Bumblebee parked in his usual parking spot and Sam gave him the habitual pat on the roof before he bounded up the stairs to his apartment.

He felt a tingle in the back of his neck and almost laughed as he recognized the brief scan, catching the tail end of a black-and-white turning the corner of the other street. Bumblebee had either ignored the police car or not registered who it was. Barricade could be stealthy.

Smug amusement, Sam called what he had felt. Barricade knew. And he had rolled past the apartment complex just to rub it in that he did.

:Bastard: Sam sent.

He knew he had hit the uplink dead on because there was annoyance flowing back, then the connection was severed.

He flopped down on his bed, still smiling, actually almost laughing, then felt Bumblebee's quizzical presence.

:Didn't know Barricade was voyeuristic:

Bumblebee chuckled. :He's a Decepticon:

It was the best explanation for everything, though Sam believed that little what Barricade had done in the past years had been guided by his former affiliation. Bumblebee secretly echoed the thoughts as he slid closer. Sam hesitated a moment, then naturally linked to his partner, felt the connection deepen, and he let his eyes slide shut.

:Are you sure?: Bumblebee asked.

:Yeah.:

His body told him just how sure he was. It felt wonderful, even without physical touch. It felt like he was caressed, without a hand on his body, and it was as strange as it was wonderful.

He was sure. Very much. Because he trusted Bumblebee

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The trust had only grown. Bumblebee would never hurt him, would never harm him mentally either. Sam's understanding of the alien mind and culture was a lot deeper than any other human could ever hope to have. It came with the territory of being a technopath.

"Ready to move?" Bumblebee asked, breaking the companionable silence.

Sam nodded. Time to go home. His new home.


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